Wednesday, January 11, 2006

When they scratch at the door what does it mean?

I bought some reins on ebay a couple of weeks ago. Now that I have a horse to ride I feel it necessary to further grow my tack collection beyond merely a used saddle. One never knows when one will need to look coordinated and classy on one’s horse. Who knows, I could be invited to a show, parade, or Olympic Games at any moment and I want to be prepared.

When I received the reins in the mail, they included a color pamphlet describing the seller’s spiritual counseling business. The woman is a channel, animal communicator, horse trainer, author, nutritional consultant, energy-meridian therapist, a 4th degree black belt, and founder of Zen Horsemanship. I am thinking I purchased my reins from God herself. Boy, do I ever feel inadequate after reading that resume. The pamphlet included a number to call for past life readings, channeled readings, spirit communications, animal totems, energy balancing, ghost evictions, and animal communications. At this time, I don’t have much need for past life readings or ghost evictions; however, I am kind of intrigued by animal communications.

“Animal Communications are about healing. This takes place in the subtle body of the animal, spreading to their human companions. Increased awareness to the animals’ needs and their purpose is a benefit gained.”

I read all of this and took a good look at my dog Missy as she gnawed on her Nylabone.

“Sucker…I’ll lie here and look like I am all into this and just as soon as that chick leaves to ride her precious horse I am so on the couch.”

I looked over at the other dog as he lounged on his dog bed…

“Ya, AS IF I am supposed to be comfy on this piece of crap. I call the chaise!”

Feeling very increased in my awareness, I bought 2 new dogbeds today.


Amanda Frazier said...

AAAAAH!! I know my dog is doing that crap to me too!
Like right before I leave for work in the morning, I say "be a good girl for mommy" and I leave while she looks pitiful and sad. But I bet she DAMN SURE waits until I pull out of the driveway, then says "whatever bitch" and starts looking for something to destroy!

hot babe said...

Stupid blogger won't let me comment under your voice post.

Okay, but that is so cool- you're the voice!! You should do an audio post of what you say for your duties as The Voice. I think that's really cool. You're one step away from doing voice over for commercials- how cool!

Amanda Frazier said...

Hey woman, why can't we post on the new one? Where Oh Where have you gone??